everything is starting to die...

+ 24 Hour Party
so the 2nd 24 Hour Party started... I arrived late because I took a nap. I was in the middle of a nightmare where I was driving and before passing through an intersection the railroad crossing lights started flashing but the cross guards werent working... so I didnt know if I should stop or not... I passed to find out that the whole intersection had become row after row of crossing railroad tracks... with lights for each rail I started driving through the endless tracks trying to find safety... but then Grant called me and saved me from my nightmare...

I was late and they were at McAlisters waiting for me. Eventually Cole, Grant, Emily, Stephen, Laura, and I went to Target and Wal-Mart in search of a hacky sack. After an awkward moment involving flailing hands... We left for Austin's house where most of our time was spent... People swam or got pushed into the pool, people ate dinner, watched a movie, played around, and then most everyone fell asleep...

I however did not... I let them sleep for awhile, until I thought it was about time that we start moving onto graceland too. people just kept wanting more sleep and I kept pushing more and more for people to get up. I sang jingles, told random facts, jokes to try and get them up but noone wanted to... I went into the other room... and that's when I realized I was being annoying...

Everyone was tired, and here I am annoying the crap out of everyone. I thought about it, I couldnt believe I was doing that. People have told me before how annoying and pestering I can be. I see now that's what they meant. I didnt want to be the cause of everyone's pain. I wanted people to have fun... so I eliminated the problem... i left. As I was getting my stuff, Laura asked where I was going... so i lied, i told her that because everyone was sleeping we werent going to need the things i brought so I was putting them in my car...

I walked outside to find that it was pouring... hard enough (with flooding) that I shouldnt go driving at 2:30 in the morning... but I went anyways, if my friends were going to have fun, i couldnt be around. So I drove off with low visibility and going about an avg of 20-35 miles an hour while text messaging Austin. He has been really friendly but after being hurt as often as i have, i wonder if it's genuine. He tried to get me to come back, however I couldnt face everyone now...

Anyways I got home and just went to bed. I'm not even sure if people stayed after that. Cole told me he got up at 4am and people were still sleeping, I think he said he left after that... so i dont know if people left or if they stayed for the rest of the 24 hour party... I wanted them to have fun - so that's why i left... so i hope they did.

i hope they can forgive me for being so annoying... how can they put up with someone like me? I cant stand myself.